.....me.....

When i was a baby, guess i was only thinking to have a soothing arms of my mother, don't care of certain politeness...poo and pee here and there... When i turned five, live gave me a new experience, social awareness, ability to know the difference between right and wrong, hey, and this is the age where i learnt my Javanese language skill. ahahahha.. When i leaped to ten, the room is wider open. My sister was taken by her husband,,hehe,,no one to help me to colored our favorite coloring book anymore. I got a new friend, crazy about rollerskating - soon rollerblading, bicycle has been a part of me. First to learn martial art. First to give a boy in school sum peace of mind, leaving a mark on his body, made dad came to school to settle..hihi...owh, I learnt gymnastic too...but didn't last for long... By the age of 15, to a certain extent, was a pretty tomboy, still learning martial art, first to experienced monkey love - first to traveled abroad(between age 10 - 15), a cool teenage life, loved by people, don't bother about things, basket - volley ball crazy...and now, to my surprise, i decided to take a sewing course......huffhuff...out of nowhere.. Reaching twenty, life is rather miserable, a sudden maturity has arisen. Made a huge mistake, a stupid one precisely. Still active in sports and made some important decisions in life. 25 was my gold year. yes,it was. Great job, good salary, met great people. Still continue traveled to different places, get some exposure in life from different parts of the world. Now, I'm reaching thirty...Life is not as simple as it seemed. A wish to go back to the past and make it better, wish to say goodbye or sorry before he leave this world, wish to make a brand new surprise in life, feel like settling down, but lost sometimes. Wanna be - don't wanna be. Well, life is a circle. It goes round somehow. It won't wait for us to be ready.

Food is love

Dengan sedikit usaha, keringat, kesukaan, cinta, saya senang membuat semua ini menjadi nyata.....akhir minggu akan membuat masakan baru ah! semoga ada orang di rumah, jadi gak mubazir..hihi "Aplle Pie" "Asam - asam daging" "Cheese Cake" "Mashed Potato with minced meat balls" "Pastel Kentang" George Bernard Shaw once said, “There is no love sincerer than the love of food.” Where there is a fusion of continents and food, you’ll fall in love with both.

Journey that makes a man

“Time will heal the pain”. But for some cases, with time passes by, the pain gets deeper. One can say that they love a particular person so much but the action of love is zero. yes,indeed, it's hard when you talk about love and the control of feelings that you can't stop within yourself. A fool is someone who does not know but does not want to ask. and we all ever been a fool once or twice. We tends to leave what is important to us and give up on trying...or perhaps too weak to try?? Anyhow, in my case, the finishing line is not as important, it's the journey that matters. I have tendency to push myself to forget and forgive, and move on. I remember the good ones, and throw away the bad ones. But i do take my time to think, feel every pain within me, and learn from my mistakes. Yes, you can cheat others, but you can never cheat yourself. No matter how hard you try, you can always hear the sounds of your heart. Be sincere, do your best, though your finishing line is not as good as your wish. Seperti ucapan teman saya ini "

Indahnya hidup bukan seberapa banyak org mengenal kita,tetapi seberapa banyak org menjadi bahagia setelah mengenal kita"

Haattchuu

Pagi ini jadi bersin – bersin akibat naik becak di udara dingin semalam selama hampir 40 menit, tidak membawa jaket, tubuh jadi tidak bersahabat ditambah alergi dingin dan debu. Payah sekali. Si partner lagi ngambek, harus dibengkelkan hari ini,,,aahh,lama sekali ngambeknya….hiks ditambah memikirkan jumlah lembaran rupiah merah yang harus dijumlahkan untuk membayar si partner…..heewww…..rasanya kok bisa beli satu motor yah? Hiks. Tiba tiba malam tadi saya jadi sangat merindukan dia. Entah. Ingin rasanya mengirim pesan singkat, tapi saya mengurungkan niat. Ingin rasanya ditemani seperti malam malam sebelumnya. Rasanya saya akan menyimpan semua rasa ini, sementara waktu, untuk diri saya saja…menyimpan rasa rindu sampai jatuh tertidur. Yah, saya juga hanya manusia biasa. *galau*

Plead insanity

People claim insanity as part of their defense. They don't have to feel guilty for killing someone. *Lunatic...I wanna be one right now, before i start killing things.

choice

Princess Fiona: "I want what any princess wants - to live happily ever after..." Snow White: I'm sorry but this isn't working for me. , "I'm waiting to be rescued."

Saat ini...

saya ingin.... berlari - lari kecil di pantai dengan sepotong gaun pendek dan sendal jepit menghirup aroma tanah di saat hujan bergelung di sofa, menatap air hujan yang jatuh dari pinggir jendela makan strawberry segar dengan cream putih buatan sang oma duduk di arena al-fresco sambil menikmati blueberry pie dan bir dingin...or juice perhaps....hummm....?? bertemu kamu lagi, memeluk, menghirup aroma vanila, hanya untuk memastikan kamu baik baik saja berjalanjalan di hujan bersama sang kekasih menatap bintang di langit dan tersenyum karena tahu saya sudah berada di belahan dunia lain bersepeda di udara dingin dengan jaket dan topi wool aaaahhh, saya tidak terlalu peduli dengan saya yang sekarang hidup naik turun, capek bekerja, bosan mencari uang saya tidak peduli dengan gelar guru terbaik se-jabodetabek, ga penting! tidak peduli apakah kamu pedulikan saya atau tidak, tidak peduli si mobil mau merengek atau mengembik, terserah saja. saya sedang ingin mengosongkan pikiran,,,,, dan bersantai sejenak saja. *hidup ini indah*

Treasure every moments

There is no going back. There is no drawing against tomorrow. You must live in the present of today's life. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness, success, and love. The clock is running. Time is like a coin you can spend only once. Use it, make it count, treasure it with someone special. Special enough to have your time and remember time waits for no one. for yesterday is a misery and tomorrow is a mystery. Make the most of today. *sing this song I could stay awake just to hear you breathing Watch your smile while you are sleeping While you're far away and dreaming I could spend my life in this sweet surrender I could stay lost in this moment forever Where every moment spent with you is a moment i treasure I'm glad i spent it with you.

Wish upon a star

I've never seen a shooting star. If i do, what would i wish for? wish that hundreds of miles away you were using your wish on me. a year from now, we're lying down side by side on a big field of grass, holding hands still, kissin', tangled with too many blanket with stars as our rooftop.

Arabic Bellydance Tabla

good for next djembe session..hihihi

pearl jam last kiss

Djembe Solo Hip Hop Style

Monotony

“There's no excuse to be bored. Sad, yes. Angry, yes. Depressed, yes. Crazy, yes. But there's no excuse for boredom, ever.”

a sweet sad song sent this morning

There was a time When I was so broken hearted Love wasn't much of a friend of mine The tables have turned, yeah Cause me and them ways have parted That kind of love was the killin' kind Now listen All I want is someone I can't resist I know all I need to know by the way that I got kissed I was cryin' when I met you Now I'm tryin' to forget you Love is sweet misery I was cryin' just to get you Now I'm dyin' �cause I let you Do what you do - down on me Now there's not even breathin' room Between pleasure and pain Yeah you cry when we're makin' love Must be one and the same It's down on me Yeah I got to tell you one thing It's been on my mind Girl I gotta say We're partners in crime You got that certain something What you give to me Takes my breath away Now the word out on the street Is the devil's in your kiss If our love goes up in flames It's a fire I can't resist v I was cryin' when I met you Now I'm tryin' to forget you Your love is sweet misery I was cryin' just to get you Now I'm dyin' �cause I let you Do what you do to me Cause what you got inside Ain't where your love should stay Yeah, our love, sweet love, ain't love If you give your heart away I was cryin' when I met you Now I'm tryin' to forget you Your love is sweet misery I was cryin' just to get you Now I'm dyin' just to let you Do what you do what you do down to me, baby, baby, baby I was cryin' when I met you Now I'm tryin' to forget you Your love is sweet misery I was cryin' when I met you Now I'm dyin' cause I let you Do what you do down to , down to, down to, down to I was cryin' when I met you Now I'm dyin' to forget you Your love is sweet I was cryin' when I met you (fade)

just a perfect words for you

Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs. --Pearl Strachan

a lot in mind

A friend said: The one in my heart is not a secret because it's only one. The lots in my mind should be secrets, because there are too many of them to let out. They are all special and beautiful, and that makes me happy" beautiful things are for you to see, beautiful hearts are for you to treasure. my partner is special, he has both things. that's why i stick around.

He

He certainly tall, and kinda skinny. His worn jeans were few inches too short. His messy hair smells nice. Sweat all over his forehead. Obviously crazy about bikes. Immature yet mature... Serious but silly. He makes me laugh, he makes me mad. Here are few silly questions that i asked him a while ago,,just for fun. MEAT he: food. ELEMENT he: yang drummernya GIGI?? hihihi ICE DANCING he: brrrrrgh PASSION he: Jesus...Passion of Christ COLD FEET He: ga bisa jalan BIRTHDAY He: sepi dan lilin TRACY He: pacar ORIGINAL He: KFC RULES He: didobrak IMPORTANT FIGURE He: GI Joe MIDNIGHT SNACK He: menyenangkan LOW AND LAZY He: loneliness UNHAPPY FACE He: hybrid moments A VISIT TO THE DENTIST He: Jamila = jatuh miskin lagi ROBOT He: unhuman=slavery TEDDY BEAR He: sok lucu WISH He: malam sebelum tidur CONDOMS He: karet LOVE He: gift (sweet :D)

I could have been your old - best friend

"Tell me why are still friends? When everything says we should be more than we are". "That's weird and funny". It was a lovely idea, a beautiful story and for a moment she wished she could believe it. Then, that night, snow fell. Be special, important, and happy. He loves me at any rate, she thought.

John Mayer - Who Says (Official Music Video)

Kings of Convenience - Mrs. Cold (Music Video)

hihihihiahhahhahahahhaha

lucu kadang, dia berpikir saya sok tau padahal saya tidak tahu apaapa ttg dia. hey, apa kamu tidak berpikir? kamu pun tidak tau apaapa ttg saya, siapa yg memulai semua ini? maaf, kamu hanya anak kecil egois menurut saya. tidak apa. saya selalu tertawa terbahak bahak melihat semua ini. yah, u are a joke,man!

a hand to hold

Grayish hair, blue eyes, naughty smile, shorts – knee length socks – plus sandal, red wool jacket, apple sauce chicken, blueberry pie, hot coffee – fresh milk and dry gin, patat met mayo sauce, vanilla, sit by the river, people – watching, motor mabur, tobacco, one last hair cut, one last nail cutting, my partner in crime. Miss you, gramps.

little hands

Sometimes you get discouraged Because I am so small And always leave my fingerprints On furniture and walls But everyday I'm growing big And soon I'll be very tall Then all my little hand prints Will be hard to recall So here's a special hand print Just so that you can say this is how my fingers looked when I placed them here today.

leaning backward

That man… Could do nothing, Cold at heart, Missing her, Could only stare at her picture, Haul, Hold every breathe, Not to touch her. Far away so close. That woman… Think that he’s sweet, Care for her, Think of him one-two times, Left the memory behind, Obstruct, Wish him happiness, He is too little too late. It is okay to miss someone. It is not okay when you have someone, then start missin’ someone else. He doesn’t wish to be the oddball. She doesn’t wish to pretend to be who she is not. She is letting him go. He started to miss her. She doesn’t wish this wind. He thinks it’s a hurricane. He’s been longing for her, wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. She thinks it’s a bit too late. She loves the other guy, not him, no more. She could only stare at the screen, say nothing, but good bye in her heart. She turns at her back, hold his hands. They leave the memory behind. He could only stare,,,at their picture,,,feel the pain in heart. Try to capture every moment…but it’s too late. He is always a second too late

Nobody sees a flower

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling - Arthur Brisbane. but,,,,hey reality sucks,,,,you can't always expect to have every little things to be good and perfect. what can make you suicidal? try to be light at heart and except things you cannot change, courage to look forward, i guess? i ain't no good person myself, but i try to keep peace, if my peace get distract, i'll create hell. but, I thank God, to have such a caring friends like them. Thank you for being with me in my high and low :) well, there's a saying: You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

Reminiscence

beberapa hujan membawa rasa sedih, rasa rindu, rasa sepi. tapi tidak hujan kemarin sore. setelah sesi djimbe yang kami lakukan di setiap minggu, kami berhujan - hujanan...hihihi...sperti anak kecil yang mendapat perman lolipop saja. rasanya menyenangkan. yah,seperti itu. bergandengan tangan di sepanjang jalan setiabudi, tertawa - tawa, berbelanja kue tradisional, dipeluk, dilindungi, dibisikan kata cinta. “I am the happiest creature in all the world. Perhaps other people have said so before, but not one with such justice. I am happier even than Jane; she only smiles, I laugh.” – Jane Austen (Pride and Prejudice) there's no place like home, yes, indeed. i agreed. home is to far, but they made me feel like home. a cup of warm tea, fed with love by the love one (humm...mungkin sang mama berpikir betapa romantisnya dia sekarang =P), showered and used a warm long sleeves, he hugged and kissed me, put a warm blanket and said have a good rest, i love you. see, u can be sweet if you want to,right? see how well i describe you. love is not always necessarily shown by goods, poem, love songs, or whatever, sometimes a walk in a rain is enough. it's just perfect,my dear. :) hey, kamu tampak cantik dengan bando saya...hihihihi, dasar gila halma.

the courage to change

seorang teman dekat mengutip Dr.Creflo Dollar "keberanian seorang pria diawali dengan keberanian untuk berubah". menarik. saya yakin teman saya ini memang seorang pria yang berani untuk berubah, dia sudah membuktikannya. bravo! bagaimana dengan anda - anda sekalian? dimana nyali anda? well,take it slow and keep moving forward for a good change in life ;)

phew...

She pulled her pajama and t-shirt over her sleep clothes. The world was as dark as eyes closed, but perhaps because she’s been thinking about him and their little fight. She would never tell how small and ugly she felt. Let him. Let all believe I don’t care. I don’t. What could she wish for? To be as tall as a tree, to have an ear to hear the Linder ripe for the harvest, to bloom like a flower that never been watered, to fly and chase the wind? Nope. She has her pride. Too much in her. She tried to lower down her stupid pride and finally agreed to see him and get over the fight. Yes, she’s been longing to see him. Owwh, how she hates the quarrel they had a day before. She made him a small note in a sweet purple card. “I’m sorry. Please forgive me? I love you.” He had taken her in his arms, kissed her with such love, and smiled. She knew she would leap across the hilltop if he asked it. Despite the pain and weakness after a fight, she kept the “cheeeppyy dumdumdum shalallaala” feelings tight to her heart and enjoyed the hugs and kiss. She liked her laugh better than the taste of jellybeans in the mouth. At the sound, her heart feels lighter. Thank God, she likes the gift she gave her. She enjoyed the shoes and walking around the house with it. His sister came and made a compliment of her new hair cut and busy talking about their so-call-date on Sunday. Owh,well..She will sleep over tonight. :) She couldn’t ask for more happy time. Thanking God for every little things.

menerawang

cinta atau kegilaan sesaat? kadang saya merasa salah ambil jurusan sewaktu kuliah dulu. jurusan yang seharusnya mampu membuat saya memahami pribadi unik masing - masing orang. yaah,,humm,,saya jadi berpikir kekuatan cinta membuat orang buta atau tepatnya mengalami kegilaan sesaat?? kehidupan pribadi yang buruk mempengaruhi pekerjaan, kehidupan sosial, pikiran menjadi tidak benar, negatif, dan kecenderungan menyakiti dan menyalahkan orang lain atas kegagalan yang kita alami semkin besar, alasan alasan dipakai untuk membenarkan rasa sakit dan pembalasan dendam yang entah perlu atau tidak. sangat disayangkan sekali. kadang saya juga mengalami hal yang sama. temporary madness. but as fast as i could, i try to get back in a track. well, but sum people like to have self pity, kecenderungan untuk mengasihani diri sendiri dan seolah tidak bisa bangkit dari rasa sakit. yah,kadang saya merasa kasihan, kadang saya pun merasa jijik. humm,,,hujan keras di jakarta,,,membuat perasaan rindu semakin terasa. I'll be back soon. for you. ohya, beberapa orang mungkin tidak akan menyukai saya yang cenderung diam,straight forward, dan serius. eh,tapi sebenarnya tidak juga seperti itu. saya bisa sangat menyenangkan kalau saya mau, tapi maaf jika ada orang - orang tertentu yang tersinggung,,,hehehhe,,,,,itu artinya saya memang tidak bersimpati terhadap anda. cheers! :)

A perfect glasses to match your day

White people love these Ray-Bans because they were very popular in the 1960s and the 1980s. This gives them a historical precedent and allows white people to classify them as “timeless.” I've got two of those myself. Hiks. But need to fixed coz i've been using it for years. old,ma??*singlish style...hihihihi I wanna get this for my sweet love. I got him once a cycling sunglasses,apparently he was too strong and somehow broke when he used it for a cycling competition..hiks

"Today it's all sunglasses and T-shirts."

~ Missy Hinton quotes We must pay attention to timing and to other people or we will be out of tune. It is better to be hated for who you are, than to be loved for someone you are not.

next destination

pacar sang mama pernah bertanya negara apa saja yang sudah pernah saya kunjungi. lalu perbincangan semakin menarik, dan beliau menunjukkan foto - foto travellingnya bersama sang suami(alm) tercinta. saya lalu mengatakan kepada beliau jika saya punya rejeki lebih nanti, saya ingin mengajak beliau mengunjungi kota Ho Chi Minh yang menarik. saya ingin membuat beliau senang dan bergembira, karna saya menyayanginya seperti ibu saya sendiri. kemarin ketika berbincang bincang dengan sang pacar, keinginan ini saya utarakan. kami sama sama meng-amin-i hal ini. kota ini cantik secantik sepasang sepatu yang akan saya berikan sebagai kejutan di hari ulang tahun mama sang pacar besok. sepatu yang disepakati sang pacar akan disukai beliau. I'm just thanking God that I have him and his sweet family in my life. Thank you,dear mom, for having my beloved boyfriend as your son. :)Senyum ceria.

Sandhy Sondoro - MTV Studio - 02 End of The Rainbow

There is no storm too big that isn't followed by a rainbow

mengutip dari ucapan seorang teman. nampaknya ia optimis sekali. padahal pelangi tidak selalu datang. saya bisa memahami perasaan orang - orang yang bermimpi mengenai pelangi besar di atas langit sehabis hujan badai. maaf,teman, kamu harus realistis. hidup ini memang penuh badai. cobalah bersikap dewasa. memiliki mimpi itu baik, tapi tak selamanya mimpi yang berkepanjangan akan menjadi kenyataan indah seperti yang kamu mau. saya tidak menyalahkan. memang jelas kamu, saya, dia, mereka...berbeda. pelangi ini milik saya. silakan cari pelangi lain.....atau.....saran saya, membusuk saja di dalam neraka? tak baik mengingini milik orang lain. maaf.

blluuuupp bluupp bluuppp

tooloooonnggg, saya tenggelam semakin dalam. tangan siapa yang sukarela menarik saya? saya terjebak dalam lingkaran setan terkutuk. semakin memburuk,membusuk,sampai rasanya mau mati saja. sampai kehabisan nafas di dalam air. ah, tapi itu bodoh bukan? saya tahu ada kamu yang menolong...jika kamu masih punya waktu untuk saya. well,God is very busy,you know?? sometimes He'll let us fall for reasons.

The Calling - Wherever You Will Go with Lyrics

Radiohead - Creep

BREAD - IF (a picture paints a thousand words) with lyrics

a must have song :)

Living In A Box - Room In Your Heart - Top Of The Pops '89

Lovin' this old song....

Putar Ulang

rewind. rewind. rewind. saya senang sekali hari ini, saya senang sekali hari ini, saya senang sekali hari ini. That's what he said. I play it in my head over and over again today's review. Saya juga. Malam tadi di sebuah sofa tua, kami duduk bersama. saya, sang kekasih yang bergelayut manja di lengan saya, ibunya, dikelilingi dua bocah kecil. Kami tertawa, sibuk melihat lihat foto, berceloteh mengenai kejadian siang tadi kepada sang ibu. Membawa jalan jalan dua jagoan kecil. Rasanya seperti memiliki keluarga kecil bersamanya. Menyenangkan. Saya ingin tetap tinggal. Saya ingin kamu tahu, saya juga senang sekali. Marilah kita lengkapi hari ini dengan memejamkan mata, menaiki sedan merah tua buatan Jerman berlambang segitiga, dan mendengarkan lagu cinta ini bersama....

Bermain Peran

He grabbed her hand, stopping her from leaving the room. He : Didn't you hear what i said earlier? She: What??!! He : I said "Iloveyou" She: Stop playin' around. I stared at you and you didn't say a word. He moved closer. Whispered in her ear. Held her with one arm to her chest. She gasped. She could smell the after bath smell in him. She: You fool. I can't hear you when you say nothin' at all. He : I said it in my heart. She: Let me go! I'm not in the mood for this nonsense. He kissed her passionately. Look into her eyes. and gently move his fingertips around her neck. He: Now, can you feel it?

This is just...

A stupid blog. With a stupid writer. Case closed. I don't need self satisfaction.

List of..

Things to do before the year end: * Get things back in line * Sell the car and get a new one? * Save some money * Have a holiday with my boyfriend * Get mom n dad a nice x'mas presents * Try to get a friend to talk to me again :) * smile at the end of the year...that's what i need most.

Why am i trying so fucking hard??

just because I love You. Damn.

turn ur lights down

why are you afraid of the dark when you can see nice things in the dark? :]

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within. ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

tears in your eyes

Annie The Musical - Tomorrow

I just stick out my chin, and Grin, and Say....Oooooohhhh

Two sides of the coin

Je me souviens... each person has two sides of a coin in their life. so do they. le gars de la vanille...that's him (Alm). The vanilla guy. He loves vanilla more than anything. Pagi hari dibuka dengan secangkir kopi vanilla. A vanilla air freshener. Vanilla buble bath [cute]....more and more vanilla. Seorang kekasih lama (Alm) yang sangat stylish, metroseksual, penuh dengan tato, dan jago bela diri. Pria menarik, cheeky, dengan pandangan yang mampu meluluhkan hati perempuan. Biasanya kami akan sangat hatihati dengan tipe ini..hahaha..tapi saya tidak. Tak diduga, lakilaki ini penggemar berat minuman ringan rasa anggur miu-miu, dengan lambang kucing lucu, selalu terobsesi menjadi kesatria hitam penunggang kuda, ia juga tipe romantis dan sangat manja, senang disuapi dan dilayani. Ia kombinasi ayahnya yang Jawa ningrat dan ibunya yang keturunan Belanda. Ia sangat...hmm...cool and calm... another lover in a past that ever filled my heart was a good friend. la tête en pierre...Yup. That's a perfect word for him. Known him since we were young. Been together here and there. Apart for quite a long time. Get back as a lover. But guess in some part, I felt we were better off as a friend. Campuran Maluku-Belanda membuat lakilaki berkulit putih-tinggi-besar ini sangat keras kepala. Pekerja keras-sangat "determine"-ambisius-berlidah tajam. Bekerja adalah nomor satu dalam hidupnya namun ingin selalu menyenangkan pasangan dan generous. Ia akan memberikan apapun yang ia mampu berikan-suka bersenangsenang-mampu membagi saat bersenangsenang akan menjadi maksimal-saat bekerja tak ingin diganggu. Dibalik sifat keras, Ia sangat suka bercanda, tidak romantis namun akan berkata "Lagu ini untuk kamu - dan mulai bernyanyi. akan berkata "Cantik sekali hari ini - Ah,seneng tuh dipuji :D". Ia pun manja-namun purapura tak butuh. Akan merajuk saat saya benar benar marah. dan mau mencuci sendal saya (yang dianggapnya sudah kotor) tanpa diminta..ahahaha... Seorang mantan pemain basket nasional-eksekutif muda-penyayang anjing-namun sensitif. Tapi tentu saja, semuanya sudah berakhir karena saya tidak suka orang yan keras - seberapapun saya menyukainya - saya akan mampu meninggalkan dan tak menoleh kebelakang. Maaf, perjalanan kita sudah berakhir. Lalu, saya menemukan dia.... Mon Amour... Lakilaki berdarah Sunda-Pakistan. Tipe unik yang jarang ditemui. Mampu membuat saya amat marah-terpesona-dan jatuh cinta. Pendiam, tinggi, tidak terlalu kurus-namun sedikit lebih besar akan lebih baik :D, sangat baik hati, tidak neko neko. Jauh dari tipe metroseksual-pandai bermain alat musik-senang bersepeda-menyukai teh dan kopi. Tipe yang jauh berbeda, namun saya cinta. Tidak mampu bermanis manis, namun tiba tiba akan berkata "Kamu cantik" - atau "Ayo kita menikah" (ajakan yang datang entah karena desakan mamanya yang menginginkan kami menikah sebelum tahun ini berkahir atau memang sedang merasa romantis saja? ) hahhaha...whatever the reason is, saya senang bersama dia karena dia adalah orang yang mengatakan "sayalah orang tidak waras itu" saat saya berkata "hanya orang tidak waras yang menginginkan bersama saya yang keras kepala, suka marahmarah ini" Mon Amour,Oui, je veux être avec vous pour toujours...

Cantik...

Brainy Beauty

Issabela Fiorella Elettra Giovanna Rossellini,born 18 June 1952, an Italian-swedish actress, filmmaker, author, philanthropist, and model. Beauty won't last forever. Brain does. She's a truly beauty,,,and I never forget her since.

Affair

You think you are good enough for everyone. You think you can have both. Classic. but you are not. too bad. The harder you try,the worst it seem.

Paranoid

Bulir bulir keringat meluncur membasahi pelipis. Waspada. Pupil mata mengecil. Detak jantung tak seirama. Tabuhan genderang mengikuti langkah. Tulang tulang menjadi kaku. Sosok asing mengikuti derap langkah. Lajuan kaki kaki semakin cepat. Berlari. Tak menoleh kebelakang. Membuka. Menutup pintu. Dalam hitungan detik. Iringan gerakan jantung yang naik turun, irama nafas tak beraturan. Peluh bercucuran. Perlahan meluncur. Menutup muka. Menarik nafas panjang. Desahan di sela sela daun telinga. Detak jantung semakin kencang berburu dengan dentingan jam dinding. Membuka mata. "Haaaiiii....". Sosok mungil menyapa.

Parted

Sleeples I listen to the surge and drone And drifting roar of the town's undertone Till through quiet falling rain I hear the bells Tolling and chiming their brief tune that tells Day's midnight end. And from the day that's over No flashes of delight I can recover... And I in my loneliness, longing for you... I am alive Only that I may find you at the end *Siegfried Sassoon*

it's only words

If a man and a woman really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then. no string attached is better than a broken string...

wish to have one of this pair...

I was once bought a brazilian sandals when i went to one of the country,,, You know what, it is probably the most comfortable sandals I’ve ever had! I’m not afraid to make this bold claim because I was truly amazed by it. I wish I could wear it to work. Wish to have the urban male this type of new sandal here,,,

No Greater Love...

than a Love of our friendship... If only I can tell you how-much-I misyu-I love you-I regret saying things I should have not said. Saya menangis lebih keras disaat sedih, tertawa lebih pelan disaat senang...cause you were not there to share those moments. You have changed me, us, and some people's live by the touch of your hands-your care-your kindness. You act so tough, people think you are tough - but somehow you are,,,but there were fragile moments where you cried under the shower or just hid yourself behind those pillows. I acted blur sometimes-hold you sometimes. You said you always give your best at the end of everything. You gave me the beste meals, beste love and care, beste friendship of all. You said i was different-special made-a lost culture girl-and deserve better. You were more than just a friend, you were a sister-a tutor-a partner in crime. I know the day you said "Sorry-I can't take care of you anymore then" is the day i walked away with my own Stubbornness - ini masalah prinsip - saya ingin bahagia - saya tidak suka diceramahi. You gave me something that i will remember for the rest of my life...that i deserve better. Saya tahu kamu peduli dengan caramu - memandang dunia dengan lebih luas - melakukan yang terbaik dalam hidup - tanpa pedulikan apa kata orang. Will we still have that orphanage? will we still be able to visit those countries that we planned to visit before? You changed a spoiled-brat into a lady. Kamu yang paling mengerti saya yang-moody-gila belanja-paranoid debu-sensitif-emosional gila. Malam ini saya merasa lebih hancur. Dua kali lebih hancur. I have failed and can't put myhead up anymore.

Could i ask for more?

"Aku suka jalanan, karena jalanan membuatku bertanya ada apa di ujungnya.." (L.M Montgomery) Hampir sama dengan ungakapan kisah hidup kita. dicinta - bercinta, ditinggalkan - meninggalkan, sedih - bahagia, senang - merana. The things always happens that you really believe in; and the believe in things make it happen. I'm a person that always(almost)believe that good things will happen if we do good to others, walau terkadang menjadi batu sandungan diri sendiri, dibodohi, sekaligus menjadi naif. But,hey! I learnt my lesson well. Roda berputar. Saya bahagia bersama dia yang sekarang bersama saya. Kami merencanakan hidup bahagia bersama (May God listens)... I have wonderful friends (though sometimes people come and go, but the memory remains),great boyfriend (though i have high expectation - and He sometimes suffer :P), great job - with good salary (more less the same like mid-level of management in some banks), a bit of debts here and there - plus car loan (worth to buy), well you couldn't ask for perfect life,right? almost perfect,maybe? huehehehhe I usually don't get distract easily with some annoying people, but we happened to meet one sometimes, that's pretty normal. I'm looking forward for a brighter, better, life..looking forward to it and I'm being grateful with what i have now.

Unsolved

dan.... dia tahu saya tahu saya tahu dia tahu kita hanya diam.... hilang. tenggelam. dalam pikiran masingmasing. tak berujung, entah, sampai kapan. saya hanya ingin kamu ingin....